Last weekend, the world’s favourite celebrity couple Will and Jada Smith confirmed that she was involved in an ‘entanglement’ with singer August Alsina. In a twelve-minute video on her show The Red Table Talk, they shattered the idea of a perfect marriage.
“I feel so betrayed,” a friend told me after watching that video.
She is not the only one. Scores feel betrayed that the Smiths have for 22 years portrayed a perfect marriage to the media and online. While I am glad that they came out to show that there is no such thing as perfection in relationships, I don’t think they owed anyone an explanation.
I mean, they are adults and whether they choose an open marriage or not, it’s their business. And we all know that had it been Will involve in some sort of entanglement, it would have barely made news.
Keeping up with the Mwauras’
I have a real problem though with the people who follow celebrities on social media and believe the things they post. My all-time favourite quote is one by American writer Andrea Dworkin which illustrates how the sun never stop its glow to wonder whether it’s good enough or worthwhile or even what the moon or Mars thinks of it. The sun just shines, regardless.
I can’t say the same of most women, especially the current breed. Today’s Kenyan woman is obsessed with keeping up with the Mwauras. She is constantly worrying about what everyone else thinks about her life. Before agreeing to a marriage proposal, before getting off the pill so that she can conceive, even before taking up that amazing job offer, she will stop to think of what her peers will think. She is always seeking affirmation and she’s constantly second-guessing herself. Worse, she has gone a notch higher to seek this validation online from strangers and celebrities who have no clue that she exists.
Before she makes a decision, she will post on a group with ten thousand members, none of whom she has met. She will make even important decisions because she saw an Insta-model or influencer say that they do it. She will believe that marriage can be perfect because Will Smith and his wife paint an ideal one.
It’s disturbing how committed we are to watching other people’s lives. We forget that the lives of celebrities are show business. How much money most of them earn is directly proportional to how much fuss they can create around themselves. That celebrity you see posting pictures of her life by the hour has the mandate to create certain images or illusions of it. Do me a favour, let the credits roll on this Jada and Will video, and watch out for the full movie crew. Who pays for all this talent, if there is no money to be made?
Stars feed on the illusions they can sell to their audience. If she thinks that the illusion of a perfect marriage is what her followers want, they will give it. If a sex tape or controversy is what will sell, then she will create it and if she can’t, she will fabricate it. Anything to get more hits.
Before you go using someone on the internet as a benchmark, remember that whatever you saw or heard may not be true. They may not even believe those things they post or sing in their songs.
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